Sigh ..... i miss her and yet she missing another guy ...
lol darn why am i still thinking of this -_-"
i think i shld not read her blog anymore ...invading her privacy =den easier to foget her forget this relatinship ...forget this feeling.
-hehhe luckily she dunno this blog .... or else cham =\ ....
-----------------------------
sian sia .... yang cas jotham eug all leave lux .. now left mi alone ...
have to work till 10 of feb den can get the one month pay sia .......
plus feb2 onwards i have to work two jobs.
1230 to 10 lux . 4am to 11am night market....
good sian work for 5 days at the night market can earn 400 dolalr ....
so derefore .. for the sake of money i got no choice but to work
and after i get all my pay ard 1000++.
WOHHHOOOO time for enjoyment already ....
take a break till result ....
GO BACK DANCE.
and go for hiphop lesson ...
can continue my interest again ...
darn darn feb 10 FASTER COME P:LSSSSS!!! =D
<3
11:29 PM
Saturday, January 22, 2005
Ever since u said it was all over..
my life has been living hell....
all alone i have been ....
surviving enduring it all ....
throughout this torturing process ....
my true self .. my confidence....my smile .. my courage ... my heart was all lost ....
everything just shattered....
when u said these words..
u did not care about my feelings ..
u just did what u deem fit .....
dreams of u day and night ...
dreams so true and real.....
dreams that i always wanaa ..
dreams that always don come true.
dreams of holding u tight ..
dreams of us being so in love
everything was suddenly gone ..
when my eyes start to open ....
i tell myself ..
everything was over ....
what can i do ..
but to suffer in slience ..
no one knows how i feel ...
no one knows.......
<3
5:23 AM
Friday, January 21, 2005
wooohooo..
my com back up again....
dunno some shit graphic card problem..
sigh
dunno why
when i open my browser..
i type out her blog address..
den ..pressed enter...
den ta da ... i was inside...
saw this poem ..
thinking that it was meaning full..
guess .. she been hurt again by some other guy ...
yup all i am thinking now is work work and work..
no relatinship .. no nuttin..
i no need one ..
just another burDEN....
MUST MAKE LOTS AND LOTS MONEY....
oh ya ..
just some update..
life in lux ..
was well ... okay ..
my teammates was ultra super friendly .. i think best team in warriors divison....
most of dem was in their 20s and 30s .. but we still get along well..
yesterday due to our good performance .... we went to marina south .. and had STEAMBOAT !! YUMMY..
we eat and tok cock all night long ..
man it was fun ...
nvr exp that since a long time ....
I MISS DANCE
I MISS CREA
I MISS THE PPL IN CREA =<
I NEEDA A BREAKKKKK!!!!
lolz
<3
11:42 PM
Saturday, January 15, 2005
SIGH..
Regretted working in jdl for the past one month ...
earn so dam little .....
still have that darn fine to pay ...
zzzzz .......BARELY enough to last mi till end of this month .. when i get my pay at lux man ...
sigh ....
i am so unlucky ....
born in a pathetic family ..
with a pathetic father ....
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....
sigh have to withdraw from the chingay performance ....
it is always my dream to perform ... my interest mmy hobby to dance on stage ...
and chingay such a great oppoturnity .. performing to almost 300 000 ppl ....
i guess i have to skip that this time ....cuz if i dont work ...
where the hell i gonna find money from ....
and part time aint enough to pay my daily expenses ....
wont wanna bother my brother and my sister to give mi allowance ....
i believe dey are coping very hard financially themselves..
haiz ....
althought lux the environtment is good ..
but i can see the journy in it .. gonna be tough .... real tough ....
but for the sake of money ///
i guess i have no choice ...
but to take on this challenge ....
and survive in it ..
dunno how am i gonna pay for my poly education fees ...
maybe i will stay in lux 4ever ?....
sigh ...
my life just so pathetic .....
but sitll life have to go on ...
have to force myself to think postitively ...
in order to pass through this ordeal ....
have to cut down on my expenses by a lot now ... till end of the month ...
SIGH....
I WANNA PERFORM =<.....
.
<3
1:58 AM
Thursday, January 13, 2005
woohoo .. today finally my last day of training at LuX ...... not that shampoo company ... different pronouncation ..!
tmr finally going for attachment lo ...... out on field ...... song sia ...... another new challlenge awaits mi ...... i just love challenges ^^
<3
12:56 AM
Monday, January 10, 2005
sigh .... dunno why i still unable to sleep ... it is already 3am .....
sigh tmr still have to go over lux for training ... alone -_-"
working class sucks sia ........ so sianz......
but den .. if u ask mi to stay @ home .. i will go crazy ...
it been .. 3 months now i guess ....
i...
nvm .....
=D
<3
2:55 AM
Sunday, January 09, 2005
Let's see .. what happen today ...
Woke up ard 12+ den went to meet hao tan and roy at dobby ghaut ....
went meridian to played pooll .. not long after allan join us ..... after playing we went to ps to have our lunch .. kcf .. these 3 guys eat a lot sia 3 pic meal each .... nowadays i keep no appetitie ... eat very little ..... that why i grw thinner aha .....after eating we went to play arcade .. actually wanan watch seed of chucky .. but was fully book for the first 2 session -_-" .... we don wanna wait ... so derefore .. went to mac ... discuss our team name ... den went home and had our trainings...
sigh ... father found out that i actually smoke ....
guess i get to quit ....
dunno why i pick up that bad habit in the firs t place either ..
now end up with 200 fine + maybe 100 of counselling ....
how am i gonna pay sia ..
still got so long before getting my pay ..
and i am like dam broke now ? ....
-_-"
sometimes i just get to envy handsome guys like ws and jx ....
gals jsut come knocking at their door ? lol ....
nahz ..
foolish thoughs ....
gotta end here ..
time to slp z.
nitez.
<3
5:14 AM
Friday, January 07, 2005
Sittin’ here starin’ at the wall
Another lonely tear falls
I’m tryin’ to write you this song
But I can hardly see the page at all
‘Cause it’s breaking my heart
When I look in your eyes
And I don’t see me anymore
Oh, and you’re all I’m living for
Baby, tell me that you still believe
That you still love me
The way I love you
If you take your love away from me
You know I would die
‘Cause I’m not ready for goodbye (Oh...oh...oh...)
Baby, please pick up the phone
Tell me I’m crazy, I got it all wrong
I don’t know what I’m gonna do
I don’t know how to live without you
You are the first song
My heart ever heard
And baby, I-I believed every word
You are my heart, my soul, my world
Every breath that I take, every beat of my heart
You know it’s all for you
I wanna hold you, I wanna love you
Forever and always
<3
6:05 PM
Thursday, January 06, 2005
ok let mi post a nicer version of today ...
today actually wanna go for my last day at jdl ..but yesterday tok to sharon till 4+ ... and did not realise my phone was set to slient mode ..... woke up at 12 to see 10 miss call and 14 sms -_-" ....... den geraldine msg mi .. ask mi whether i wanan go for a job interview .. seeling some car gadget thingy ....
met at 3 .. went for interview ..... the office is located at such a ulu place sia ... so old fashioned .... den we reach dere abt 3 ... onli to find 3 ppl waitingf outside ....... inside the office no one ....... i tot we got cheated sia .. den i ask geraldine to call up that guy or whomever he is .....den he said 20 mins later ...... den mi and geraldinehad no choice but to went down for a walk .... and the weather was hot -_-" ....after 10 mins of waiting the guy came ... we filled up some forms .. den started the interview ..... this time mi and geraldine got interviewed together ..the question he ask was rather stupid .... and later tell us we are gonna selll some hands free gadget for drivers.... the pay was good ... the wrking hours was considered short ...and the place is just carpark ..so derefore ... i see if geraldine wanan take up the job ..... if she do .. den i take ..... but too bad her mum don allow ..... so derefore .... i am not going to work dere too ....maybe going over to lux ... sigh outdoor sale again .. but den no choice ba .... that stupid fine make mi need to go work .....
<3
12:27 AM
arrghh the unluckyiest day i ever had ......
went to orchard .. go out somoke with yt .. den throw cig butt on the floorr ..
den very very unfortinately. . we got caught by moh ....
fine 200 dollar + counselling ...... ARRGGHHH
fuck jdl sia .. fuck it knn ..
lonely new year again ....
<3
12:22 AM
Tuesday, January 04, 2005
oooo.it been a long time since i blogged .....
quitting jdl tomorrow ... tomorrow will be my last day ... cause cannot full time liao .. cuz the chingay performance to catch up with ..and not much time left ..... maybe go over yang dere work part time .. just earn some cash ..
today .. after a month .. i went back sch again ..... saw her again ... ... nvm .... went back to see these cheerleaders ... hmmz onli ard 5 performiing for orientation ... and very last minute preparation .. hope dey will do well ......
after that .. went with hao tan to tpy .. meet up with allan and play pool 4 awhile .... den went to orchard meet up with tim and jx ... went to eat .. procceed on to kpool ....
sigh tmorrow leaving jdl soon .... cant bear to leave my family dere
